Our Journey

Our Beginning

Who would’ve ever thought we’re gonna meet online?!?! We went to the same university, we both took  up BS Accountancy, we have common friends and yet we haven’t met during those times.  Yeah, right… no kidding! I met him in Friendster and it was a “WOW Mali” to begin with.  Two years ago, I got a message from a Friendster user ” iled”.  He introduced himself as Rodel.  He doesn’t have any picture in his profile.  I just assumed he was a former classmate in PUP.  Oh! by the way, he also mentioned the university…one of the reasons why I thought he’s the Rodel that I knew way back in college, only to find out he was somebody else.  And to top it all, I already gave him my contact number and YM! We even started chatting before I found out that I was talking to someone I didn’t know.  Then he began calling and texting me (he’s in Singapore, by the way).  He told me he knew me then, that he’s got a crush on me when we were in college…blah…blah…blah! It’s flattering but I opt not to believe in all these things that he’s been telling me.  After almost a year of constant communication, almost everyday of exchanging serious, funny, some non-sense and even out of this world conversations, still there were no pictures (gosh, ano kayang itsura nya?!? lol), finally came October 5, 2008marked the beginning of  “my journey” with him.

The Betrayal

Again, who would’ve ever thought that the “Big B” would hit me big time just 3 days after our 1st monthsary? Seems like hard to believe, right?!?! Yeah, sure…I almost could not believe it as well.  But it happened, it did…It’s true that only the one whom you love the most has the capability of hurting you the most.  After 8 long years of not letting myself fall for someone because I was too scared of getting hurt, I finally took the chance of falling inlove again.  But it seems like no matter how hard I tried, there’s no way that I could protect myself from being deeply hurt.  I can’t help but ask myself, “what have I done to deserve this?”  It’s so  unfair…I just can’t put into words how hard and painful it was.  There were probably no words that could ever explain how I feel that time.  But what’s done is done…we can never turn back time for the “what we should have done or shouldn’t have done”.  I’ve only got two options…

An Ending that Leads to a New Beginning

December 11, 2008 (Changi International Airport, Singapore)Our first meeting.  Yes, you read it right!  It’s not a typo.  We’ve waited for this very moment to arrive, we were so eager and excited to finally see each other.  It took us 4 months to finalize our Singapore-Malaysia tour.  It would be our first planned trip together.  But it turned out to be the first meeting that two people who love each other would never want to be like.  I deserve to hear an explanation for what he has done and he has a lot of explaining to do.  He did it pretty well, I guess…but my brain couldn’t just accept his reasoning. I didn’t hate him (though that’s what I am supposed to feel towards him).  But still, our planned trip did not push through.  I left for Malaysia without him and stayed there for 3 days, then back to Singapore.  We met again, we met up with some friends, we went shopping and we talked the whole night at the hotel’s lobby.  It could have been fun and exciting being with him and spending time with him had it not because of what happened.  But life has to go on…so, the morning before my flight back to Manila I finally said “thank you…and goodbye…”

Love Does Not Keep Records of Wrong

It’s time to move on.  I just have to be thankful for those times that he made me feel special and loved for those times that he made me smile, for giving me the courage to love again.  But he’s been so persistent,  he keeps on explaining things over and over again, asking for another chance.  Sigh…call me a martyr, I won’t complain.  But I am not a hypocrite.  I can lie to anyone, but not to myself…not to God.  I still love him.  I never thought I would love him this much, but I do. Yes, it’s easier to forgive than to forget.  I gave him another chance, but it’s really a struggle forgetting what happened.  No one would ever want to be in my place…no one would ever dare.  It’s hard to bring back the trust that was lost.  Distance made it harder for me…for us.  But if things seem to go beyond your control, you just have to let go.  You just have to let God run the race for you.  Nothing’s ever powerful than a prayer coming from the heart.

Meet the Parents

I didn’t know he’s coming!  Monday – Three days after my birthday, he woke me up with a phone call  early in the morning telling me not to open my windows messenger.  Out of curiosity, I asked him why?  Well, he told me that the technician will be there and he might get caught.  Then, his brother sent me an SMS which goes like “ate dumating na po padala ni Rodel, pwede po ba tayo magkita bukas?” The following day, I received another text message from his brother asking me if we could meet up the next day instead, because he’s still in the office.  I’m beginning to doubt that it’s not his brother who’s texting me.  And so, come Wednesday I received another text messages.  Finally, we met at Mall of Asia.  Wanna know why he didn’t tell me it was him?!?!  Because that time, we were not OK!  And if he did tell me  it was him, I won’t meet up with him. toink!!! We had dinner in President’s Tea House (seaside) MOA, then Starbucks Market Market on our way to my place.  Since it’s already late, he slept over to our place (thanks to my sister’s offer! hahaha!) He occupied the other room, my sister (from Dubai who’s also having  a vacation) and I in my room.  June 11, 2009 – it’s my sister’s birthday and since she’s gonna celebrate it with her friends Rodel & I went out to see a movie.  We watched Terminator (The Salvation), I almost fell asleep in the movie house (Sta. Lucia).  Again, it was already late so I stayed in their place.  I met his parents and his younger brother.  I was a bit uneasy…but I managed to be calm! whew!!!  Question and answer portion? Of course there was! Hehehe…I should know, my father’s like that too.  The next day I met his ate, older brother and rest of the family.  They were all nice to me, I should say.  They made me feel like I’m part of the family.  June 19, 2009 – now, it’s his turn to meet my parents.  He cooked for me (by request), lunch! No, we’re not Chinese hahaha!  My parents love him! (anong ginawa nya?!?!) Spending a week with him was the best birthday gift. c”,)

Oh, I should’ve written “Meet the Parents” (and the rest of the family) toink! wehehehe…

Meet the Family Video <=== Click here to see the video

or

http://www.facebook.com/home.php?ref=home#/video/video.php?v=111222750906

I’m Sorry, I didn’t Know…

Whew! This happened few days before our 1st Anniversary.  Ironic, isn’t it?!?!  I won’t go into details but  I guess what’s written below says it all.

Just the mere thought that he’s still trapped in the past, struggling to move on, to let go, to forget and to forgive hurts me more than I ever thought. I didn’t know it was her…because if I did, I would have think twice before communicating with her or at least ask him if it’s OK. It just happened by chance…probably because it has to happen. And I’m sure, it happened for a reason…

“Hatred and insecurities infect the mind but love dissolves them. Hope that my love for you is strong enough to dissolve them…or at least lessen the burden that they are causing you…even if it means getting hurt twice as much as you do…”

I want him to be happy and find his real purpose in life. No matter how tough life could be, I will always be around and he’ll always be in my prayers.


Letting God & Letting the Years Count

Happy 1st Anniversary!!! What else can I say?  Despite all the things that happened, we’ve come this far. Thank you for loving me and for not letting go of me when I feel like giving up on us.  Always letting God be at the center of our relationship will surely give us a very strong foundation of love, trust, respect.  Let’s just continue to pray for each other no matter what happens. And may the Lord keep watch between you and me when we are away from each other.  We still have a long way to go.  Our journey has just started and the rest is yet to be written…

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50 Responses to Our Journey

  1. amor says:

    I’m reading now.. hindi kaya maging movie ang love story nyo? hehehhe

  2. Czhelle says:

    hahaha! gagawin nga daw nyang makulay ang buhay ko eh…aba, why not?!?! kung magiging movie basta ba happy ending. lolz

  3. Czhelle says:

    but i want a love story that never ends…and i want ours to be everlasting! naks…lolz

  4. amor says:

    malala ang sakit mo tet ha! bwahahhaah

  5. Czhelle says:

    ang tawag dyan ay adictus sa bago kong website! hahaha…

  6. Edith says:

    hi tet, hahha..nice story..even me until now di makapaniwala nagustuhan mo si rodel..peace..lol pero wow oo nga pala one year na kau..imagine that???..hope forever na noh..lahat naman ng girls looking forward sa happy ending..let’s keep our fingers cross..di ba..

  7. Pong says:

    Celeste, your so talented… putting into words all that you felt and all that happened.

    Your are right with this ….
    what’s done is done…we can never turn back time for the “what we should have done or shouldn’t have done”

    that’s why we should learn to Forgive and Forget…
    and be whole again after we are torn apart, for it is only what we are that we can give.

    if the past is not the past, there will be no present.
    that’s why I always look back at the past and be thankful for I know I will never be this happy without my painful past.

    God bless you and Rodel.

  8. Czhelle says:

    @Edith: thanks sa comment, hahaha! di ka pa rin ba makapaniwala?!?! i’m not just keeping my fingers cross, i’m keeping my faith in God! 🙂

  9. Czhelle says:

    @Pong: Thanks! Medyo matagal na rin akong di nagsusulat eh…si Rodel lang nag-push sa akin na gamitin ko daw “talent” ko kasi sayang, hehehe!

    Hope to see you here regularly, following and reading my blogs! 😀

    God Bless You Too!!! 🙂

  10. Pong says:

    yap, why not… if its okie with you? i know it’s painful 🙁

    buti na lang di nagkatuluyan si Rodel at yung ex nya… kasi ngayon mas masaya si Rodel at super inlove ka 🙂

    Things happens for a reason…

  11. Czhelle says:

    @Pong: yeah, sure! everybody’s welcome here… 🙂

  12. may says:

    ayan pde na magcomment dito…galing ng pagkakagawa iba ang nagagawa ng LOVE.. ;P

  13. Czhelle says:

    @May: ikaw ha…hinintay mo talagang i-post ko dito para makapag-comment ka! lol

    Salamat sa pagtangkilik! hahaha! 😛

  14. ma.antonette j. nesas says:

    A funny love story…meron pa pala ganyan.Sana lang di sa hiwalayan ang tuloy..hahahha!!!kilig. tawa. wish you luck gurl…

  15. Czhelle says:

    @Antonette: funny ba?!?! it just started with “WOW MALI” hahaha… 😀

  16. Leizl says:

    Hmmm…Ano bang masasabi ko?..hmmm…mukhang WALA! Hahaha,, You know why? Kase ayoko ng masabon dahil pinakikialaman ko daw ang LOVELIFE mo. Sabi nga nila mangialam man ang kaibigan puso at puso pa din ang masusunod..wahahaha…Anyways, Tents I know hindi lahat ng pinagdaanan nyo eh naikwento mo ng lahat sa kin pero if ever you need someone to talk to, I’ll always be here sister! Keep the FAITH, ok? Sabi ko nga you should understand his situation..kung me pagkukulang man, punuan mo na lang. Give and take ba? Hehehe…o sya basta be good and wag ka na sanang paranoid, okie?!

  17. Czhelle says:

    @Leizl: thanks sis for always being there for me…as i’ve said, super naa-appreciate ko mga advice mo sa akin, not just because friend kita at close tayo but because di biased ang mga advice na binibagay mo…and thank you also sa prayers & support. i’m so blessed i have a friend like you…love you sisterette! 😀

  18. Kath says:

    There’s always a risk in loving someone right….for as long as your happy at wala kang nasasagasaang tao….magmahal ka lang ng totoo….un naman ang importante sis…i do hope for your happy ending! just always see the brighter side of life pag may mga negative na dumarating…wag intindihin ang mga panggulo sa buhay hahaha para di mastress oki 😀 ….keep the faith and kaya nyo yan! in fairness ha ang haba na nitong comment ko hahaha….

  19. Czhelle says:

    @Kath: parang linya lang ni Rodel yang “magmahal ka lang ng totoo…” hahaha! mga negative at panggugulo sa buhay…erase! erase! erase! hehehe…tama sis, just always look at the brighter side of the situation. pag na-stress, papangit! hala…ayokong ma-stress!!! maraming salamat sa comment! i want MORE! hahaha… 😛

  20. mariel says:

    wala kong masabi tet kundi iba talaga nagagawa ng love! stay inlove sis! god bless!

  21. Czhelle says:

    @Mariel: hi! thank you sa comment… 🙂 oo nga eh, naibalik ang passion ko in writing, hahaha! 😛 gawin ko daw productive ang oras ko kaya ayan! 🙂

    God bless you too, and stay inlove as well… 🙂

  22. wheng says:

    mare happy ako na sinunod u ang puso mo..saksi ako sa pinagdaanan nyo ni pare ..salamat sa tiwala mo nung mga panahon na kelangan u ng payo isa ako sa nilapitan mo..stay in love at hinding hindi mo yan pagsisishan..sana next year makasal na kau.ng magkaron na ng kinakapatid inaanak mo..hehehe..-D

  23. Czhelle says:

    @Wheng: shocks! mare, naiyak naman ako sa comment mo…naalala ko tuloy yung nangyari, anyway…tapos na yun, ang importante eh yung ngayon. salamat sa lahat…sa support and prayers at sa mga advice especially during those times that i needed them most. i am truly blessed, maraming salamat sa inyong lahat… 😀

  24. mheg says:

    ang galing-galing mo naman.. sobra!
    i always wanted to do the same thing. share my feelings through writing, kaya lang i think i don’t have the talent to do it. some other time i’ll try it nga.. hehehe..

    i admire you both on how you handled your relationship. you for being true to yourself and following what your heart desires even if you were hurt, and him for not letting you go. above all, you shared the same faith in God..

    i would say you have a fairy tale story and i just hope you’ll have a happy ending. yun tipong “and they lived happily ever after..”

    madami pa kasing problems that you both will or may encounter. just be always strong. you’ve been through hard situations and i’m sure you’ll be able to get over those things that might come in your way..

    have a happy life with him through Him.. always follow you heart.. God bless! stay in love and happy.. =)

  25. Czhelle says:

    @Mheg: touched naman ako sa comments mo… 🙂 maraming salamat!!! 😀

    try mo din gumawa one time…you know naman na hobby ko talaga ang pagsusulat eversince at medyo gifted kahit papano hahaha! mas na-eexpress ko kasi feelings ko through writing eh.

    thanks for the advice, wishes and prayers! i’m always keeping my faith in God…

    God bless you too and stay happy! 😀

  26. phoebe says:

    awwww, kilig naman ako… hehe:) stay happy:)

  27. Czhelle says:

    @Ate Peng: maraming salamat! hehehe…stay happy din with azul… 😛

  28. mommy weng says:

    wow that was long!lol

    i really hope that it would end well with you and your someone. i wish you more anniversaries to come.

    you still have long roads to take and believe on this…to make a relationship works, it requires falling inlove to the same person again and again. make him inlove w/ you more than you are inlove with him.;D

    stay happy celeste!

  29. Czhelle says:

    @mommy weng: thanks sa comment, advice at good wishes! hahaha…lahat yan ang reklamo nyo, ang haba! lolz bear with me naman…1 year yan, summarized into how many words lang! wehehehe…

    naku po! uhmmm…falling inlove with him over and over again?!?! kayang kaya kong gawin yan…yung make him fall inlove with me more than more than my love for him?!?! teka, tanungin ko muna sya kung kaya nya? hahahaha! pag hindi ang sagot, anong gagawin ko!?!?! lolz 😛

  30. Satinder says:

    Nice family video, fun and togetherness WOW too gud 🙂
    2008 A Love Story… thats the perfect title for your Love column 😉 My best wishes 🙂

  31. Czhelle says:

    @Sunny: thanks! wehehehe… you really took the time watching the video huh?!? 😀

  32. weng says:

    WOW CUZ… INLOVE KA TALAGA… GOODLUCK TO YOUR LOVELIFE.. STAY SWEET… HEHE

  33. Czhelle says:

    @Ate Nene: thanks! thanks! hehehehe… 😀

  34. mitch says:

    Teka naman…kelan ang anniversary nyo? Grabe ni hindi ko pa nakikita man lang tong “the one” na to…In fact, I haven’t seen him then one year na pala kayo…tsk..tsk..tsk…

  35. Tereh says:

    hey girl, akalain mo yun, 1year na pala kayo. at nakakatuwa talaga pagsusulat mo ha. bat di ka kaya gumawa ng book,baka marami kang mainspire. ganyan ata nagagawa ng inlove eh. hehe. anyways, sana magtagal pa kayo ng maraming taon at sana siya na nga. hehe. ingatz ka girl. sana reunion tayo minsan.

  36. Tereh says:

    pahabol, hindi ko napanood yung video, nadelete mo na ata. upload mo ulit. hehe. sulat ka pa ha. mwah!!

  37. Czhelle says:

    @Mitchay: October 5…eh, lola pano mo naman makikita yun nasa Singapore na uli, hehehe…2 weeks lang naman dito yun kulang pa spend ng time sa family nya, friends at sa akin kaya pano ko pa mahahanapan ng time mapakilala sa inyo. yaan mo pag uwi uli nya, akyat tayo para makilala nyo at bonding moment, hehehe…

  38. Czhelle says:

    @Tereh: thanks sa comment and of course sa wishes! 😀 i wish the same to you…stay happy! 😀

    sabi nga nila gawa daw ako ng book, pinag-iisipan ko pa…hehehe! yup, organize kayo ng reunion tagal ko na rin kayong di nakikita eh…nakaka-miss! hehehe…

  39. Czhelle says:

    click mo na lng yung isang link, nasa facebook ko rin yung video na yan, hehehe… 😀

  40. Sean says:

    Wow! So many people love you! Keep blogging! =D good job Celeste!

  41. Czhelle says:

    @Sean: thank you… 🙂
    they are my friends, therefore they are required to comment! hahaha…and I love them too!!! 😀

  42. Marlyn says:

    Galing mag english wow! pwede ba kita kunin secretary haha..buti pa ikaw di nauubusan ng english hahaha sarap basahin ng story mo.

    I wish makapag publish din ako ng ganito iha hire kita para magtranslate …

    God bless

  43. Czhelle says:

    Hi Em! 😀 it’s nice to see you here. Thanks for the comment 🙂

    Hahaha! Sige, translate ko…mura lang naman PF ko, lol! 😀

  44. Marlyn says:

    papatranslate ko sayo in Spanish hehehe…kebarbaridad!

  45. Czhelle says:

    Hahaha! wag naman Spanish! 😀

  46. mary jane says:

    ang ganda ng story…sobrang cheesy…nakaiyak at first but as the story goes along ngiging cheesy…

  47. Czhelle says:

    Hi Jane! Thanks for dropping by 😀 ma-keso ba? hahaha! 🙂

  48. pie says:

    wow!.. nyc one tita!..

  49. Pingback: Affidavit of De Facto Relationship | Our Love Story

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